We have been doing traveling basketball for three years with my son and daughter. My daughter has aged out of traveling so its now just my son. We attend these events as an entire family. Here we come with our 6 children. People make comments like "here comes ALL the Rivers." We get so many comments and people even treat us diffrent on our team. People rarely even talk to us. Unless its to comment about our kids. People say things like "don't they take naps." One of my son's coaches told me yesterday "I hope you and ALL your babies have a safe ride home.
Its not like they are loud or bothering anyone. We have special toys and items to keep them entertained and snacks. I don't understand why people are so mean and have nothing nice to say. If you feel a certain way say nothing at all. Its funny to me that on my son's team last year there was a family with 6 kids but, they just never attended a game all together. As far as I know they weren't treated diffrent and people always spoke to them. There are others who bring their entire families they just don't have as many kids as we do.
Last year on my son's team some people who didn't even talk to us felt the need to try and take our children to help us without asking. Their help really wasn't needed and I don't want my kids passed around. They were strangers to them. It was rather rude the way they did it.
We always have a nice senior lady come up and talk to us because she herself had a large family. She may even sit with us and talk to the kids a while. Thats the bright side. I always love hearing their stories.
I don't think that we should be judged because we have a large family or Even more so because we are a large minority family. Yes, we hear those comments as well. I had a friend tell me that I should tell people that three of my kids are adopted. I don't feel I need to explain myself and shouldn't be judged on how large my family or where I live. I strongly believe its a class thing as well. Minnesota hasn't been a very friendly place since we've lived here. We aren't black enough to make friends with other AA families or fit in the right class for others. Its funny how you meet people and they can be nice at first. When they find out where you live or how you make a living they act funny. All of the sudden your beneath them.
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Tancee i will never understand folks who judge others without knowing what is going on. Sorry people have no sense.
ReplyDeleteI hate people who make comments without knowing the whole story! I agree with you - who needs to know that you have a mix of bio and adopted kids - who cares? I think it is awesome how you manage 6 kids - you are one of my mommy heroes!
ReplyDeletewhat is it with people being so rude to those with large families? are they jealous? or are they just plain rude? i have no idea... but i personally admire people with large families...
ReplyDeleteTancee, you know we all think you guys are wonderful, and those people who dont talk to you or judge you simply dont know what they are missing. I really dislike the way most people act!
ReplyDeleteYou know I've heard it all too. My latest comeback was rather sporadic as I answered a wide eyed on looker with, "We're not the damn Duggars!" IDK Tan, I just don't know why children still aren't reveared as the true blessings they are.
ReplyDeleteI come from a large family. My dad was the middle of 8. My mom was the youngest of 13. I'm second oldest of 5. I have always LOVED being from a large family and having a large extended family! If my husband and I hadn't started our family so late (we're both 40) we'd want more than just 2 children. I consider large families a blessing, as I'm sure your children do, or will when they're old enough to appreciate it.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure why people feel the need to pass judgement on large families. It's just not right.
I will admit though, there was a time when I was at church, singing in a choir loft, and I saw a couple come in with a "large" group of children. I remember thinking, "Goodness, they have a lot of kids!" Then I started counting them and counted 5 children...I have 4 siblings myself. It made me smile to think that others probably consider us a large family with many children too. :)
Just ignore the rude people and love your large family! They're your pride and joy!